Drafting a New Collage

Collage of Dogs Dancing I've had an idea for this collage for awhile, but have been too busy to start it. In fact, it's been awhile since I started a new collage of any sort. Being home sick, but feeling slightly better, I had the opportunity this evening to start working on this one. It is far from finished, just the beginning -- well, maybe a little more than that. I started to add details such as the pug's shoes and ballet slippers. I wanted this piece to feel festive, joyful, spontaneous and also a little romantic. It also seems to me a bit old-fashioned. Some of the dogs remind me of the romantic lovers you see coming back after World War II and kissing in the streets. I'm trying something new here as well, adding the computer-drawn pugs from my New Year's sketch to the photographic elements. I think it really works here.

Funny, how often I have run into the idea of dogs dancing lately. My friend, Jon Katz, wrote a wonderful book of short stories called Dancing Dogs and during one of the give-a-ways I ran recently a woman told me all about the dancing work she does with her dogs. I originally started my sketch of the celebrating New Year's pugs as fighting dogs, but they looked to celebratory to me so I transformed them into dancers. The Akita in this collage is my brother John's dog. I remember snapping the picture of her standing on her rear legs and resting her arms on his and thinking they looked like they were dancing. Then, I began to realize just how many pictures I had with other dogs who also seemed to be striking a pose, such as the poodle I snapped out on a "doggie spa day."

I added the children (both my niece Catherine, actually) because at the heart I think my work is always a commentary on the relationship and interplay between children and animals, only here the dogs take center stage. I love how "the girl" in the red is reaching out to twirl the ball, just as if she belonged there. I have more I want to do with this piece, but I thought I'd share it as it progresses.

 

Roots

Me with brown hair  

I was born a brunette. Actually, that’s not true. I was born bald and remained that way until I was three-years-old. Then, my mother claims, my hair grew in light. I was a toe-head, but by the time I was in second grade my hair was brown and remained that way through college. It was long and brown until I was 14 when my grandmother took me to get it cut and my first perm. After that I kept it short or curly or wavy until I graduated from college.

Again, that’s not entirely true. Just before going off to college my mom and I decided it would be exciting for me to try life as a blond, so we bought some at home hair stripper and dye. We tried the stripper, which did exactly what its name implied, stripped my hair of color and then we applied the color, summer blonde, which my mom had used in the past. It turned my hair a lovely, damaged, straw-broom orange, so we re-dyed it brown, but it was so damaged that we had to cut a lot of it off and it wouldn’t’ really style well, so I went off to start my freshman year shorn.

When I graduated college, I decided to get my hair frosted blonde. My mother, a natural blonde, had always been hailed for her beauty and I think I wanted to look like her. She also had short hair at the time, so I chose to cut mine as well. I found a pic of a short-feathered cut  a la Melanie Griffith when she was married to Don Johnson the second time around. I liked it and thus started my hair-dyeing journey.

Hair has always been an issue in my family. Dad never wanted Mom to cut her long hair, she didn’t listen, and I think I thus, saw controlling one’s hair as a sign of independence. I also found I simply liked change.  When my brother started dating his wife, Becky, she was in school to become a hairdresser and I was her happy guinea pug. She took my hair from blonde to plum to a black disaster and back to red again. I have thus been practically every color imaginable over the last twenty years and sometimes more than one color at once. When my niece Catherine would draw pictures of her family in school, she would often color my stick figure representation with rainbow colored hair.

I say I’ve been every color imaginable, but in reality I’ve been practically every color but brown. I tried to dye it back once or twice, but always hated it so much that it took only an hour or two before I went out and added some streaks or re-dyed it a different color all together.

The other day after Christmas I decided to go back to my roots, so to speak. I went to the hairdresser and asked her to dye my hair mocha with blonde tips. Actually, I think my color now is darker than my natural color, but not by much and who can really tell, because dyed hair, no matter how well done. is always more one-dimensional than natural, and, it has been years since I saw my real hair, but for now at least I’m a brunette again.

I’m not entirely sure I feel like me yet. For years I wore my hair a cherry red color that became almost signature and recently, I managed to stop dying my hair for enough years to grow it long and blonde, which I absolutely loved and felt right at home. But the itch to change came back and I cut it shorter and red, then cut it again so that I can grow it out and now, well, now its brown. As I was dyeing it, I read an article that says that men are more likely to pick up an object dropped by a blonde woman in a tight white tee shirt than a brunette, so maybe I made a big mistake, but so be it.

I’m sure there’s all sorts of psychological reasons besides those already mentioned for my hair-changing obsession, but this is what I know for sure. It’s fun, it’s an adventure and while it offers some surprise, it’s entirely within my control. It’s a way to shake things up, become a different person without a permanent commitment – it grows back, you can color it again. It’s cheaper than buying a ticket to Paris or moving to New York.  It’s a way to explore different facets of myself. It’s anything, but boring.

So in a way, getting back to my roots is a way of being a whole new me. And, I just noticed it’s even trendier than I first thought. My new color, dark brown with blonde tips, matches my dog. Waffles, like her father Puddlegum, has fawn undertones to her black coat. If you look close at her shoulders and rump, the tips of her dark fur look frosted blonde. We’ll look so cute together while out on the town, I’m sure the right pug-loving guy will stop to help us if we drop something on the sidewalk…

black pug fawn fur

What Other People See...

Schipperkke and Chihuahua Why is it that we always think our dogs or kids are the most misbehaved, our homes the messiest? This morning I visited my friend’s house to help take Christmas pictures of her dog. As her schipperke and Chihuahua/dachshund mix ran about the house, my friend kept telling me how her schipperke would need to calm down before I could snap a picture. She saw a wild beast I saw a little clown. When she brought out treats he even sat on his hindquarters and begged. When I brought Waffles to a dinner party, my friends said they saw no sign of the Tasmanian Devil I had spoken about. They probably wouldn’t think she resembled Gollum much either. Often, I have walked in to a friend’s house and had them apologize for the mess when I saw nothing but a lived-in home. People in stores and restaurants often apologize to me for their kids peering over the booth or darting around the corners, all the while I am engaged in a game of peek-a-boo with them. We worry too much when all around us the things we worry about are not signs of our inadequacy, but testaments to a full life. So, rejoice in the whirling and the spinning, the darting and the clutter. Most people probably aren’t noticing it and to some, it may even bring a gentle smile or a happy laugh.

Sugar Plum Fairies

Fawn Pug Pink Tutu I’ve been writing. I’ve been writing web copy. I’ve been writing articles. I’ve been writing Christmas cards and scrapbook captions. I’ve been writing blog posts.

I’ve also been drawing and I’ve been painting. I’ve been snapping photographs. I’ve been creating. And, this is good. Creativity, I believe, breeds more creativity. But, you still can grow weary. I realize I reached my “creative cliff” if you will, when last night even my dreams ran out of steam.

I’ve been hearing a lot about dreams lately – my sister-in-law at www.yourmomisstrange.blogspot.com has been keeping a dream diary chronically some psychic phenomenon. My friend Maria Wulf has been writing about dreams as part of a healing, soul retrieval process you can read more about at www.fullmoonfiberart.com. My dreams, on the other hand, have become utterly mundane. They need no interpretation. Worried about a looming article, I dream of handing it in paragraph by paragraph to an editor who not only rips it apart, but demands more. Anxious about meeting a friend I have not seen in awhile, I dreamed that I was late for our appointment. Wow, how inspiring is this?

Tonight I had plans to write my annual Pugdom Christmas letter chronicling the comings and goings of the pugs at my friend Joan’s home and post it here, but the words alluded me. They’ve all scattered to the far corners of my mind where they play a scribe’s game of hide n’ seek. I’m left with an empty page like an empty room and I’d probably call it a day and sit and watch the X-factor, but I’m determined to at least put something on the page. This is it. Tonight I may dream about having to post on the blog and having nothing to say, but maybe not. This is the season of magic and mystery, where sugar plum fairies dance in our heads. So 1-2-3- elusive words and deeper meanings – ready or not here I come.

On the Run

Black and Fawn Pugs Running in the Snow We're on the run over here at Pugs and Pics trying to meet deadlines, write Christmas cards and letters, make gifts, etc. etc. etc. Tonight I wrote web site copy for some relatives, helped type my brother's homework and tried to complete some online Christmas orders. I need to be up in the morning to sit by the phone in hopes that an interviewee gets enough cell signal to call me so I can talk to her for an article. I'm supposed to meet a friend tomorrow evening and I can't quite figure out where to find the extra time I need in my day. And, while my back is turned and I am focusing on all that needs to be done, my pugs are creating their own fun. Tonight, for example, Waffles bit a hole right through the middle of my brand new shoe. No moral, no point here, just a glimpse into a very busy life. It's that time of year and I'm pretty certain I'm not the only one experiencing the hustle and bustle of the holidays. My best piece of advice, breathe, time passes quickly, and, if you have dogs like mine, hide your shoes.

Remembering May

Black Pug and Girl in Fairy Wings On this hot May day, a week before Vader’s death, the sun breathes strong upon our necks like a welcome lover. We bask in its whispered promises. Tori, my four year-old niece, and I are headed off into our shared world of wonder and imagination. We are taking Vader with us. He is failing. He has lost the use of his back legs and now his front. He can no longer use his doggie cart and a sore has appeared on his front leg. We place him in a doggie stroller and push him to the small grassy island of flowers across from the house. We lift Vader out and place him in a secret pocket carved amidst the flowers.

“Vader is going to have to go to heaven soon,” I tell Tori.

“When?” she asks.

“In about a week,” I say. Vader labors in the heat, but I want him to have a moment outside. I prop his head up on the stuffed yellow dog he has loved since he was a baby.

Tori, decked out in her fairy wings, leans in planting an angel’s kiss on his head. “We’re going to miss him,” she says matter-of-factly. “Why does he have to go?”

“He’s old,” I tell her. And, tired I see now.

“Oh, poor Vader,” she says. She doesn’t cry. Instead, she kneels in the grass beside him. I snap their photo – stealing a cherished moment out of time’s clenched fist.

Now, on this December evening, near the end of the year, I search my hard drive for photos to place in the annual scrapbook for Vader’s breeder. I stumble upon this picture of child and dog, angel and fairy. To look at him now I see his withered body, the glassy eyes already staring beyond this world, I feel a twinge of pain because I can see how ready he was to go, how little of him remained here. I know I kept him longer than many would, unsure how to end this life. But, I also see him through love’s eyes and I remember his soft breath, his ceaseless cravings for fish fillets, the way he’d raise his head and stare directly in my eyes as I bathed his weary body. Back then I saw his tender soul and wondered who am I to choose his fate? In a week he made his journey. We miss him as Tori predicted. It is December now, but in the end, I choose to remember May – the sun, the fairy, my dog and me setting off on a grand adventure.

I smile now because I know a secret– in an ocean of time that rolls endlessly forward, exist tiny islands outside the daily flow. A small triangle of grass standing at an intersection of town roads becomes a garden hideaway, a magical world where a sweet young girl and a precious dog revel in the sun and the whispered promises of life.

 

 

 

 

Thank You

Fawn Pug on Floor It has often been said that being an artist can be lonely work. Much of your time is spent alone in your head and alone creating. This can be a rewarding time for those of us who love what we do, but as people have noted it can also be isolating. One of the things I love about photography is that it is art form that takes place out in the world. I enjoy my free-lance work because it allows me to people during interviews. I love art shows because they provide a chance to share my work and hear instant feedback.

I recently launched this new blog and while I have enjoyed writing each night, today, I realized how thrilled I also am interact with all of you. The Common Thread Give-a-way brought many of you out of the shadows or to the site for the first time and I loved reading your comments. Yes, it was wonderful to hear your kind words about my work – every artist loves to be appreciated – but what I really enjoyed was hearing your wonderful stories. One woman emailed me about her daughter, a struggling artist in Berlin. Others shared tales of their dogs. I heard about cairn terrier/lhasa apso mixes, Airedales, poodles, Dalmatians, Aussies, Border Collies and more. An appreciation for art and for dogs brought you to this site and it is these same things that inspired me to start it. I just wanted to let you know how much I am enjoying this new connection.

Dog Dream

Black Pug Foreground Fawn Pug in Background My friend and mentor Jon Katz is running an interactive storytelling experiment on Facebook. He asked his readers if they believed dogs dream and when the overwhelming response was "Yes!" he asked them to share their ideas of what their dogs were dreaming. As my dog Vader, who died earlier this year, aged, I would watch him in his bed and wonder as his legs twitched what he was dreaming. I even started a collage, which I have yet to finish, entitled "What Do Old Dogs Dream Of?" I am still working on that, but for now here is my response to Jon's experiment.

His legs twitch and move beneath him. He is not a small, black, pug curled up in his oversized Orvis dog bed – he is a warrior, a prince, a wolf. He runs through the woods, leaping over twigs, darting through streams. He follows his nose and the scents are strong and thick. He smells a rabbit, a squirrel, a deer. This time he ignores them all. He plows through the growing darkness and stops short outside their den – the two-legged ones. He watches, lifts his nose to the wind; they smell safe, they pose no threat. He creeps forward. One spies him, one of their pups – a chubby, furless creature.. She reaches out to him, and as he has done many times in many dreams and many lives before, he bows his head and lets her touch him. He licks her hand. She giggles and pats his head again. Soon, he will join her by the warmth of the fire, lay his head in her lap, crawl into her den. Others of his kind will be welcome here. The prince becomes a willing servant, a wolf only in a dream within a dream within a dream…